Almost everyone, according to the stats, has had the problem of signing up at a gym and then finding other things they’d rather spend their time doing. It’s time to get moving, and not be such gluttonously wasteful creatures. Here’s 20 ways to get your ass to gym!

  1. Social accountability – tweet that you’ll see your buddy there, and chances are you won’t flake out.
  2. If you work out in the morning, put your alarm clock as far away as possible.
  3. Put your gym clothes between you and the alarm clock.

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    How did she let this happen to her… oh wait, no, she chose to be a badass.
  4. Leave something that you need for work at the gym, the night/day before. It can be multiple items that you set on a rotation.
  5. Set up payment penalties. Every time you miss a workout, you pay a friend/trainer – it’s better if this comes out of budgeted money you needed for something.
  6. Think to yourself “If I stay here, and do this every day, how miserable will I be in 5 years time, compared to how great I’ll feel if I go to gym only for a year?
  7. The opposite of payment penalties – get a reward every time you go to gym. This could work if you set a certain amount of cash aside – every time you go, you get paid, every time you don’t they keep it.
  8. Know that there will be tough times and plateaus, but you only have to get through today. Just knowing this can give you the energy to go.
  9. Know that even if it’s a completely awful day, at least you had a good workout.

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    Some things you can’t control. This is something you can.
  10. Chunk it together! Think: Go to gym, feel great. Instead of: Wake up, get out of warm bed, brush teeth, put on gym clothes, get into the cold outside place filled with crazy people, fight off zombies to get to gym, try and warm up flabby cold muscles, find an empty machine… Think of the things you love – you tend to chunk the actions into blocks of activity. Do that for having a great workout as well.
  11.  Start off with some easy wins – get to gym, and do 2 minutes on the treadmill. Once you’ve done that you’ll probably feel great, so have a “backup plan” you can tackle (AKA the actual workout).
  12. Think of all those lazy people that don’t get anywhere because they stay in their farty cocoons waiting for the world to happen to them, while you’re bouncing out of bed like a 4 star MuthaF#$%# General ready to storm the world!

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    This is cute for cats. Not people. If this were a person, you’d probably want them to vacate the premises.
  13. Become a friends “trainer”. Even if you know nothing about fitness, it will at least get you to the gym, and force you to show some initiative and interest.
  14. Keep a log of every gym session. You will quickly see a chain forming. Try and keep the chain unbroken while you see your stats get better. It’s the “montage” you see in all great movies where the subject goes from a wimpy little dude, to slightly a less wimpy little dude that can kick your ass in 10 seconds flat! Inspiring stuff!
  15. Have a giant stick! Either use a service like Stikk.com or use social media. Basically, if you know you’re going to lose something big, you’ll be more than willing to go to gym for a few days, till the deadline is over.
  16. Wash your hair ONLY days that you work out. “Ew, gross!” I hear you say? Well, that’s only if you don’t go to gym.

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    This photo is actually upside down – they’re (if she has hairy legs, I don’t judge) doing a one arm pull-up with a leg on the ceiling!
  17. Create 2 short videos about 30 seconds each, and splice them together. Film one when you feel fat and disgusted with yourself, telling how you feel, holding nothing back. Film the second film after a great workout when you’re feeling fantastic, telling why the experience is definitely worth it. Watch the final video when you’re having doubts. Put inspiring music behind the second video.
  18. Put your name down for a class. If people are expecting you, you are more likely to go.

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    Do you still throw rocks at things trying to eat you? No? Well your body doesn’t know that yet, so it could be beneficial to use these in the meantime.
  19. Know that you will cultivate the habit that most people say “they can’t, because of blah blah crap fart…”. Yup, you’re that person everyone secretly wishes they could be.
  20. Remind yourself that the “you” of the future that does everything you hope they’ll do, is the same “you” as right now! If you don’t do it now, you never will.

I hope this helps. I wrote it for myself because I’m not feeling like I thought I’d feel at 32. I want to be the fittest guy I know! It takes time, I know, and I’m sure I’ll get there, but sometimes I don’t go because I get discouraged, or distracted. At least now I have 20 things to help me stay on course, and hopefully by the time I turn 33, I’ll be the stronger version of myself I want to be.